I tend to be a rather open person … when hanging out with friends, we talk about what is going on in our lives. For me lately, it tends to be a lot of conversations about pooping. I don’t think I am one to complain. But I am one to share and be open (I hope I don’t come across as a complainer). And given that side effect #1 of this cancer fighting drug is diarrhea … although it is not quite diarrhea, but it is diarrhea-esque … and for simplicity’s sake, I often just refer to it as “diarrhea”. So on to why I am doing this post … Yesterday was one of those more difficult days … after 3x going to the bathroom in the morning, I was in a good amount of pain for a large part of the day. I gave my nurse the heads-up and they wanted to see me today to assess things and try to make this situation better. So after about an hour of talking about my pooping, we do have a plan. A 3-tier plan actually. We will try tier 1, see if that works. If not, we go to tier 2 and so on. While we will not make things 100%, this is a side effect of the drug after all, we can make my mornings / days much better according to my nurse practitioner. It was a good appointment and I always enjoy spending time with her. So here we go, attempting to make my trips to the bathroom less frequent and hopefully with that, less pain.
One of the highlights for me in this morning’s appointment, she did state that my cancer is a slow-growing cancer. That was GREAT to hear!
Other things / updates in my life:
1. I have started the Keto Diet. I have been doing this for about 3 weeks. My Oncologist / NP are fine with this, they don’t have any opinions for or against my doing this diet. I am doing this for 3 reasons … #1, help fighting the cancer, #2, I have a bit of a fatty liver and this should help with that. And #3, to lose some lbs. Thus far a feel better, have more energy and my clothes are starting to fit a bit differently … so far, so good.
2. Boys started back to school last week … so summer is officially over. It was a great summer & many great memories were made.
3. Cancer sucks … yes, an understatement. But it is crazy … I have several friends each battling cancer … each one a different form of cancer. What the Fuck? One never knows exactly what to say to a friend who has cancer, but I hope I can provide some support, some comfort … I hope I can help inspire these friends to fight a strong and good fight! I so want them (and me) to kick cancer’s ass! It is funny, I am fighting cancer, but I still don’t think it has hit me 100% that I truly do in fact “have cancer” … and I always seem to be so sad when I learn of a friend who has cancer (or any health problem) … but I don’t always make the connection that I too, have cancer. I am not sure I am doing the best part of conveying my feelings on this … all I know, there is TOO MUCH fucking cancer going on!
4. Now some sad news: I had a friend I met through one of my online support groups. We had a good bit in common. Both Stage 4 Lunch Cancer patients, both had 2 kids, both are young as far as lung cancer goes (she was 12 years younger than me), both are here in San Diego county and both go to UCSD for our treatment. She was not EGFR and she had to do chemo and other treatments that I have not done … so while we had a bunch in common, we also had our differences as far as lung cancer goes. We would FB messenger each other a decent bit, but then we did not communicate the last few months. I reached out to her, no response, I then learned that she lost her battle to cancer on August 8. As I type this, the hairs on my arm stand up and I am starting to tear up. She was such a sweetheart and she had such a positive outlook. So very sad she is gone. So sad for her husband and her 2 kids. Not much else to say other than: FUCK YOU CANCER!!!!
I am not sure how to follow #4 with what is going on in my life … other than I will continue to fight. I will continue to work to get this last lesion in my left lung to shrink to nothing. My goal is NED (No Evidence of Disease), Thank you to all of the support from family & friends! I am a strong and stubborn SOB … I will beat this. I am not fucking going anywhere!
F’Cancer!